The Super Smash Bros Read Mean Tweets
by aaronp6500
Summary: Based off of Jimmy Kimmel Live's "Celebrities Read Mean Tweets" segment, the smashers read hate comments about them from anonymous online users, and some of them don't take the comments very lightly.


**The Super Smash Bros. Read Mean Tweets**

**(A/N): This little fic is based off of _Jimmy Kimmel Live_'s "Celebrities Read Mean Tweets" segment where instead the smashers read mean tweets saying bad things about them. For obvious reasons, I couldn't use real Twitter accounts, so I had to replace them with anonymous. But, in later chapters (or parts), if some of you have twitter accounts and would be willing to have it posted in possible future chapters, please let me know via PM and I will be sure to have it up there! And no, I do not have a Twitter myself, so I will not attempt to follow you or anything like that. Enjoy!**

**_Mario_**

Anonymous:

mario is an overated self centered f**k who gets all the credit for everything Nintendo duz. f**k him and his brother luigi. they can both crawl in a pipe and die.

"Well, that wasa harsh," Mario comments.

**_Kirby_**

Anonymous:

Now I understand the cause of the food shortage in Ethiopia.

**_Link_**

Anonymous:

why the f**k does Link dress like fag? XD

**_Fox_**

Anonymous:

I hated Star Fox as a kid and I still do to this day. I could never beat it as a kid. It was so frustrating and I still cant do a f***ing barrel roll!

"It sounds to me like you just suck," Fox comments.

**_Samus_**

Anonymous:

I remember when Samus used to be a strong, independent, empowered female who could kick a lot of ass and wasn't afraid to shoot a bitch. Now she's just a total objectified, feminine sex object who's too girly and dresses like that Lollipop Chainsaw bitch.

"I'm pretty sure that's more than 140 characters," Samus comments.

**_Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong_**

Anonymous:

go back 2 the zoo u f***in dirty apes!

**_Captain Falcon_**

Anonymous:

falcon punch deez nuts you douche!

**_Falco_**

Anonymous:

falco is totally a ripoff of captain falcon's blue falcon ride

(looks at the camera with a -_- face)

**_Sonic_**

Anonymous:

i swear sonic looks like a f**kin troll doll wit blue hair XD

**_Wolf_**

Anonymous:

Wasn't he in Twilight?

"F**k you," Wolf comments.

**_Olimar_**

Anonymous:

Olimar has a nose bigger than Texas.

**_King Dedede_**

Anonymous:

King Dedede's such a fat slob.

**_Wario_**

Anonymous:

Wario's face is a reassurance that everything that you love in your life and have hopes for will one day all die.

**_Luigi_**

Anonymous:

is it just me or does Luigi look high as f**k all the time?

**_Pikachu_**

Anonymous:

Pikachu looks like someone slapped him on the cheeks a bunch of times. Now we probably know why Ash is such an effective trainer.

**_Jigglypuff_**

Anonymous

Can we just say that Jigglypuff's only here for Kirby to b**w?

**_Peach_**

Anonymous:

shes such a pain to hear about in the news every day ppl talk about her like shes somethin when all dat bitch do is get kidnaped all the damn time! mario need to get a real bad bitch like me!

"Ugh," the princess scoffs.

**_Zelda_**

Anonymous:

Stop getting kidnapped so much you annoying bitch!

"Well," comments Zelda.

**_Ness_**

Anonymous:

I still don't give a f**k about Mother or Earthbound.

**_Sheik_**

Anonymous:

I don't care if this game tries to make Sheik as feminine as possible because she still looks like a guy :P

**_Pit_**

Anonymous:

Pit is such a ripoff of Cupid

**_Ike_**

Anonymous:

The only reason Ike's in this game at all is because he's the only pretty boy. That's it.

(Ike smiles)

**_Snake_**

Anonymous:

what the f**k r u doing snake? why are you in a kids game? you come from a rated m game with hardcore killing and shit, not some sissy 8 year old fighting game. you dont belong with them. you should just kill yourself. like now.

"I've thought about it a few times now, actually," Snake comments.

**_Meta Knight_**

Anonymous:

I swear, Meta Knight is so OP

"I don't know what that means," says Meta Knight.

**_R.O.B._**

Anonymous:

F**k you R.O.B.

**_Yoshi_**

Anonymous:

WHY ARE YOU EVEN IN THIS GAME YOSHI? NO ONE LIKES YOU. I DON'T LIKE YOU. JUST GO AWAY!

**_Ganondorf_**

Anonymous:

when I take a shit and look in the toilet that's what ganondorf's face looks like

**_Bowser_**

Anonymous:

You fail at life, Bowser. Stop kidnapping bitches and do something better with your life, bro, seriously.

(breathes fire to the camera)

**_Marth_**

Anonymous:

Why does Marth look like such a f***ing girl?

**_Wii Fit Trainer_**

Anonymous:

YOGAS GAY!

**_Mega Man_**

Anonymous:

you shouldint have joined this game you annoying piece of shit. go back to capcom and leave us the f**k alone!

"Ouch," Mega Man comments.

**_Villager_**

Anonymous:

Villager just joined Super Smash Bros.? God help us all.

**_Rosalina _**

Anonymous:

Oh look, another white bitch princess joined the game.

(Confusion shows all over her face)

**_Master Hand_**

Anonymous:

i bet master hand's a right hand man lol XD

"That's just gross," Master Hand comments.


End file.
